Today is Baby Em's due date.
Emotions for everyone are raw and bittersweet.
Please continue to pray for Em's mom. (side note, seeing as she has not given birth, she is simply Em's mom) As she makes final preparations, both physically and emotionally for the birth of her daughter. Pray for peace and clarity for this mama. Pray for her family, friends and everyone supporting her. Please pray for every nurse and doctor she encounters at the hospital. That they treat her with kindness and respect and not dismiss her for placing her precious baby in another woman's arms to raise. Pray for Mike & I to respect boundaries and show nothing but love to her once we take placement. Pray for Nathan as he transitions from being an only child to big brother. Pray for Emmalise as she is surrounded by this new family, people who are total strangers to her. During her most vulnerable time, she will be losing the only thing she has ever known.
Adoption is beautiful, but like anything beautiful, it comes with a LOT of pain. Don't dismiss the pain. Respect it, embrace it, learn from it and grow because of it.
Showing posts with label adoption. Show all posts
Showing posts with label adoption. Show all posts
Friday, June 21, 2013
Saturday, December 19, 2009
two years ago, this weekend
It was two years ago this weekend that we became parents. It was the Friday before Christmas, December 21, 2007. So, the actual 'anniversary' won't be until Monday, but there is just something special about the weekend before Christmas to me.
We had waited 11 long days, from the time we learned about our sweet boy, until he came home. (which, I know isn't bad for adoption, but it felt like an eternity.) We made phone calls, went shopping, smiled, laughed & cried. I could hardly sleep from excitement.
Our trip to get Nathan was a short one, only an hour away to the agency. I think we left extra early just in case. We sat at a McDonald's, down the the street and sipped coffee. A friend sent me text messages to make me smile and help calm me down.
Once we got to the agency, there was paperwork to be signed. Honestly, I don't think I even read a piece of it. I just wanted all the red tape out of the way. Bad, I know but I'm just being honest here.
Then got to meet Nathan's first (birth) mom and her two boys. We visited for what I think was about an hour. Nathan's birth family is just awesome. I fell in love with them during that brief visit.
The the interim family arrived and I laid eyes on my son for first time. I was frozen. Mike had to tell me that it was okay to go get him. I wanted to cry, but was so in shock that I just smiled and rocked him. I had wanted to become a mama for as long as I could remember. In a moment, it had happened. This boy stole my heart and I knew I would never get it back, nor did I want it back. There was a part of me that knew that his first mama still had time to change her mind. I'll admit, that is a terrifying thought for purely selfish reasons.
Our visit lasted maybe another hour. Then the social worker said a prayer over everyone in Nathan's little life and we went our separate ways. Mike strapped Nathan into his carseat for the first time, and we were on our way home, as a family.
I sat in the back seat, just be as close to him as possible. I remember rubbing his sweet chubby cheeks and listening to him coo and breathe.
That first weekend was so surreal to me. Feeding him, changing his diaper, napping with him. The things you grow to take for granted and just do.
This song comes very close to summing up how I felt that weekend. I heard it this morning, and just started crying. I remember laying awake in the middle of the night, listening to him breathe in the bassinet next to the bed. I just couldn't get enough of him.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I could stay awake just to hear you breathing
Watch you smile while you are sleeping
Far away and dreaming
I could spend my life in this sweet surrender
I could stay lost in this moment forever
Well, every moment spent with you
Is a moment I treasure
I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
I'd still miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
Lying close to you
Feeling your heart beating
And I'm wondering what you're dreaming
Wondering if it's me you're seeing
Then I kiss your eyes and thank God we're together
And I just wanna stay with you
In this moment forever, forever and ever
I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
I'd still miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
I don't wanna miss one smile
I don't wanna miss one kiss
Well, I just wanna be with you
Right here with you, just like this
I just wanna hold you close
Feel your heart so close to mine
And stay here in this moment
For all the rest of time
Don't wanna close my eyes
Don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
'Cause I'd still miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
I'd still miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
Don't wanna close my eyes
Don't wanna fall asleep, yeah
I don't wanna miss a thing
We had waited 11 long days, from the time we learned about our sweet boy, until he came home. (which, I know isn't bad for adoption, but it felt like an eternity.) We made phone calls, went shopping, smiled, laughed & cried. I could hardly sleep from excitement.
Our trip to get Nathan was a short one, only an hour away to the agency. I think we left extra early just in case. We sat at a McDonald's, down the the street and sipped coffee. A friend sent me text messages to make me smile and help calm me down.
Once we got to the agency, there was paperwork to be signed. Honestly, I don't think I even read a piece of it. I just wanted all the red tape out of the way. Bad, I know but I'm just being honest here.
Then got to meet Nathan's first (birth) mom and her two boys. We visited for what I think was about an hour. Nathan's birth family is just awesome. I fell in love with them during that brief visit.
The the interim family arrived and I laid eyes on my son for first time. I was frozen. Mike had to tell me that it was okay to go get him. I wanted to cry, but was so in shock that I just smiled and rocked him. I had wanted to become a mama for as long as I could remember. In a moment, it had happened. This boy stole my heart and I knew I would never get it back, nor did I want it back. There was a part of me that knew that his first mama still had time to change her mind. I'll admit, that is a terrifying thought for purely selfish reasons.
Our visit lasted maybe another hour. Then the social worker said a prayer over everyone in Nathan's little life and we went our separate ways. Mike strapped Nathan into his carseat for the first time, and we were on our way home, as a family.
I sat in the back seat, just be as close to him as possible. I remember rubbing his sweet chubby cheeks and listening to him coo and breathe.
That first weekend was so surreal to me. Feeding him, changing his diaper, napping with him. The things you grow to take for granted and just do.
This song comes very close to summing up how I felt that weekend. I heard it this morning, and just started crying. I remember laying awake in the middle of the night, listening to him breathe in the bassinet next to the bed. I just couldn't get enough of him.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I could stay awake just to hear you breathing
Watch you smile while you are sleeping
Far away and dreaming
I could spend my life in this sweet surrender
I could stay lost in this moment forever
Well, every moment spent with you
Is a moment I treasure
I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
I'd still miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
Lying close to you
Feeling your heart beating
And I'm wondering what you're dreaming
Wondering if it's me you're seeing
Then I kiss your eyes and thank God we're together
And I just wanna stay with you
In this moment forever, forever and ever
I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
I'd still miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
I don't wanna miss one smile
I don't wanna miss one kiss
Well, I just wanna be with you
Right here with you, just like this
I just wanna hold you close
Feel your heart so close to mine
And stay here in this moment
For all the rest of time
Don't wanna close my eyes
Don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
'Cause I'd still miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
I'd still miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
Don't wanna close my eyes
Don't wanna fall asleep, yeah
I don't wanna miss a thing
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Christmas time
Two years ago this weekend, three different families had our profile books.
We had no idea how much our lives were about to change.
Each year I prayed that I wouldn't spend Christmas without at least knowing a baby was on the way. I would silently tell God that my only Christmas wish was a baby. I would be so disappointed each year as negative pregnancy tests would give me my news. Somehow, always an optimist, I just believed that one year it would happen for me.
I remember Monday, December 10, 2007 like it was today. My pastor called to check on me in the morning. I told him that if we didn't have our baby by Christmas, I would be okay with it. I was done putting time limits on God. I honestly felt a peace about waiting a little while longer for our baby. I remember cleaning the bathroom, doing laundry and just being busy around the house. At 1pm, only a couple hours later, our caseworker called & said that we had been chosen. I cried and cried!
After 9 years of praying, I was getting my Christmas present from God.
He was so worth waiting for and I wouldn't trade all the tears for another baby.
I thank God each day for allowing me to be Nathan's Mama. I look into his eyes and see pure love.
Remember, God hears your prayers. Rarely does He answer them on our time frame. He knows better what we need and when the timing is just right. Praying you have a wonderful Christmas.
We had no idea how much our lives were about to change.
Each year I prayed that I wouldn't spend Christmas without at least knowing a baby was on the way. I would silently tell God that my only Christmas wish was a baby. I would be so disappointed each year as negative pregnancy tests would give me my news. Somehow, always an optimist, I just believed that one year it would happen for me.
I remember Monday, December 10, 2007 like it was today. My pastor called to check on me in the morning. I told him that if we didn't have our baby by Christmas, I would be okay with it. I was done putting time limits on God. I honestly felt a peace about waiting a little while longer for our baby. I remember cleaning the bathroom, doing laundry and just being busy around the house. At 1pm, only a couple hours later, our caseworker called & said that we had been chosen. I cried and cried!
After 9 years of praying, I was getting my Christmas present from God.
He was so worth waiting for and I wouldn't trade all the tears for another baby.
I thank God each day for allowing me to be Nathan's Mama. I look into his eyes and see pure love.
Remember, God hears your prayers. Rarely does He answer them on our time frame. He knows better what we need and when the timing is just right. Praying you have a wonderful Christmas.
Thursday, November 19, 2009
I just had no idea
I remember so clearly the period of time when we chose to put our new little family in God's Hands.
We hadn't been married six months yet. 19 & 20 years old, we felt a personal conviction about birth control & knew we wanted kids. We discussed it and decided to just stop using any form of BC. I remember offering a silent prayer, telling God that my future kids were in His hands and His timing.
I just had no idea what I was saying. Really, I figured it would be a matter of months before I could start telling people that we were expecting. That's how it goes, right? '
I just had no idea the journey that silent prayer would lead me through.
My sweet boy is nearing his second birthday and I said that prayer 11 years ago. We've seen infertility, more tests that I care to think about, a hysterectomy, loans, caseworkers, adoption, court, judges, papers, papers and even more papers!!
Our marriage and at times my own faith, has been pushed to certain limits.
I just had no idea the decisions we would face. Do we want to remain childless? Should we try fertility treatments? What about adoption; domestic, international, foster?
During all of this though, I can look back and see God's amazing Hand guiding our path. Whispering into our souls and comforting when there were no words to be spoken.
I just had no idea how many tears would fall when I put my life in God's hands. Somehow, I naively thought it would be easier than this.
Yet, as we are getting ready to embark on yet another adventure to bring our next child home, I feel so secure. I know that He is right here with us. I know that He has a perfect plan for our lives. Sure, to us it looks messy, painful and hard. But since when is my point of view the one that matters?
Every step we have taken has shaped who I am and the deep faith I have gained. I wouldn't trade it for all the tears I've cried.
We hadn't been married six months yet. 19 & 20 years old, we felt a personal conviction about birth control & knew we wanted kids. We discussed it and decided to just stop using any form of BC. I remember offering a silent prayer, telling God that my future kids were in His hands and His timing.
I just had no idea what I was saying. Really, I figured it would be a matter of months before I could start telling people that we were expecting. That's how it goes, right? '
I just had no idea the journey that silent prayer would lead me through.
My sweet boy is nearing his second birthday and I said that prayer 11 years ago. We've seen infertility, more tests that I care to think about, a hysterectomy, loans, caseworkers, adoption, court, judges, papers, papers and even more papers!!
Our marriage and at times my own faith, has been pushed to certain limits.
I just had no idea the decisions we would face. Do we want to remain childless? Should we try fertility treatments? What about adoption; domestic, international, foster?
During all of this though, I can look back and see God's amazing Hand guiding our path. Whispering into our souls and comforting when there were no words to be spoken.
I just had no idea how many tears would fall when I put my life in God's hands. Somehow, I naively thought it would be easier than this.
Yet, as we are getting ready to embark on yet another adventure to bring our next child home, I feel so secure. I know that He is right here with us. I know that He has a perfect plan for our lives. Sure, to us it looks messy, painful and hard. But since when is my point of view the one that matters?
Every step we have taken has shaped who I am and the deep faith I have gained. I wouldn't trade it for all the tears I've cried.
Monday, November 9, 2009
Updates
So, I've been slacking on blogging this last month. I'd like to blame it on recovering from surgery, but I know that's not true!
Update on my health: I had my follow up visit with my doctor & asked for a referral to an oncologist. Turns out Nashville has one of the best Oncology Centers in the country. I knew I was in good hands as soon I started looking into their center.
I will be honest, I was beyond scared to meet with the oncologist. I was afraid that she would tell me that I needed chemo, more surgery or worse that there was nothing they could do. Now, I didn't really expect to hear the latter, it was just fears. I think I cried more that day that I had in a month.
Once I got to the hospital, I was amazed at how well run it was. I got checked in quite quickly and almost no waiting time. Which was good, because I was a mess.
Once I met with her, she immediately put my fears aside. I didn't NOT have cancer. I did have a potentially malignant tumor in my ovary, but not cancer.
The down side to it all? I am now "high risk" for ovarian cancer. I have to go in and get a blood test & ultrasound every six months. Once I hit "natural menopause", as all the doctors keep calling it, we will re-evaluate leaving my ovary in place. For now though, it is providing my natural hormones and I'm just not willing to lose that.
Recovery from surgery has been good, overall. I have to keep reminding myself to take it easy and not overdo. My body does remind me when I get to doing too much.
My doctor seemed very impressed with my recovery though. I told him it's a lot of prayers! So, thank you to everyone who has been praying for me. It has been a whirl wind 6 1/2 weeks, and I have been blessed to be covered through it all.
Update on Adoption: We are currently looking into doing foster/adoption with the state. Our classes start next week and we should find out more about it all then.
So, any sales from Etsy shop won't directly be going to the adoption. Just me running a small shop from home. At least for now. Who knows what God has planned for our lives. We are just taking one step and waiting for direction.
Update on my health: I had my follow up visit with my doctor & asked for a referral to an oncologist. Turns out Nashville has one of the best Oncology Centers in the country. I knew I was in good hands as soon I started looking into their center.
I will be honest, I was beyond scared to meet with the oncologist. I was afraid that she would tell me that I needed chemo, more surgery or worse that there was nothing they could do. Now, I didn't really expect to hear the latter, it was just fears. I think I cried more that day that I had in a month.
Once I got to the hospital, I was amazed at how well run it was. I got checked in quite quickly and almost no waiting time. Which was good, because I was a mess.
Once I met with her, she immediately put my fears aside. I didn't NOT have cancer. I did have a potentially malignant tumor in my ovary, but not cancer.
The down side to it all? I am now "high risk" for ovarian cancer. I have to go in and get a blood test & ultrasound every six months. Once I hit "natural menopause", as all the doctors keep calling it, we will re-evaluate leaving my ovary in place. For now though, it is providing my natural hormones and I'm just not willing to lose that.
Recovery from surgery has been good, overall. I have to keep reminding myself to take it easy and not overdo. My body does remind me when I get to doing too much.
My doctor seemed very impressed with my recovery though. I told him it's a lot of prayers! So, thank you to everyone who has been praying for me. It has been a whirl wind 6 1/2 weeks, and I have been blessed to be covered through it all.
Update on Adoption: We are currently looking into doing foster/adoption with the state. Our classes start next week and we should find out more about it all then.
So, any sales from Etsy shop won't directly be going to the adoption. Just me running a small shop from home. At least for now. Who knows what God has planned for our lives. We are just taking one step and waiting for direction.
Monday, September 28, 2009
Giveaway Winner
Random Integer Generator
Here are your random numbers:
18
Timestamp: 2009-09-28 15:12:32 UTC
In total, we had 20 comments, but one was deleted & one didn't want to be entered.
So, the 18th comment entered into the drawing was from Joel! Hooray Joel! I'll send you an email to get all the details together to make the dress for your sweet girl.
Thank you to everyone who has promoted this giveaway & my etsy shop. This blog got over 300 hits since last week. That's amazing to me. A lot of people have been looking at my etsy shop as well.
I am currently taking order for dresses and anything else in my etsy shop. As I said before, all the proceeds are going to our next adoption. Keep watching for specials to hit the shop. I'm thinking of doing a Christmas special.
Monday, September 21, 2009
Giveaway
I'm doing a giveaway! WooHoo!!
This weekend I decided to kick start my etsy shop again. Sewing is a passion of mine, so what better than sewing to raise funds for our adoption?
In honor of re-opening the shop, I'm giving away a pillowcase dress.
The dress you win will be custom made, to your size & fabric choice.
All you have to do to enter, is talk about this giveaway & mention my etsy store. Simple right?
You can get up to 3 entries by:
1. Blog about the giveaway with a link back to this blog entry or the etsy shop. Leave a comment on this post with the link to the post on your blog. 1 entry
2. Twitter about my giveaway or about mamasmess etsy shop! Make sure to leave a comment below to let us know. 1 entry
3. Join my Facebook group ~ Mama's Mess. Leave a comment letting me know! If you've already joined, that counts too, just remind me. 1 entry
Please make each entry a separate comment. This will make everything much cleaner & help ensure that entries don't get overlooked.
***Edited 9/22/09 10:05AM CDT ~ Since some people don't blog or twitter, let me know how you promoted the giveaway & I'll consider it for an entry. The idea of the blog & twitter is to let as many people know about the giveaway & my etsy shop as possible. ****
The giveaway runs from 9:30 AM CDT today (9/21/09 Monday) until 9:59 AM CDT, September 28th (Monday). The winner will be chosen by random.org and I will post the winner on this blog. If the winner does not respond within 24 hours, a second winner will be chosen. Unfortunately, we only accept U.S mailing addresses at this time.
This weekend I decided to kick start my etsy shop again. Sewing is a passion of mine, so what better than sewing to raise funds for our adoption?
In honor of re-opening the shop, I'm giving away a pillowcase dress.
The dress you win will be custom made, to your size & fabric choice.
All you have to do to enter, is talk about this giveaway & mention my etsy store. Simple right?
You can get up to 3 entries by:
1. Blog about the giveaway with a link back to this blog entry or the etsy shop. Leave a comment on this post with the link to the post on your blog. 1 entry
2. Twitter about my giveaway or about mamasmess etsy shop! Make sure to leave a comment below to let us know. 1 entry
3. Join my Facebook group ~ Mama's Mess. Leave a comment letting me know! If you've already joined, that counts too, just remind me. 1 entry
Please make each entry a separate comment. This will make everything much cleaner & help ensure that entries don't get overlooked.
***Edited 9/22/09 10:05AM CDT ~ Since some people don't blog or twitter, let me know how you promoted the giveaway & I'll consider it for an entry. The idea of the blog & twitter is to let as many people know about the giveaway & my etsy shop as possible. ****
The giveaway runs from 9:30 AM CDT today (9/21/09 Monday) until 9:59 AM CDT, September 28th (Monday). The winner will be chosen by random.org and I will post the winner on this blog. If the winner does not respond within 24 hours, a second winner will be chosen. Unfortunately, we only accept U.S mailing addresses at this time.
Saturday, September 19, 2009
Journey to my baby
It's almost 5 am, and I've been awake for 3 hours now...
Shortly before Nathan came into my life, sleep doesn't always happen in one long shift. He's been sleeping through the night for over a year now, Praise the Lord!
I remember a little less than two years ago, waking up in the middle of the night for no reason. I would toss & turn and then finally get up. I hate just lying in bed awake. Friends would joke that I was in the final stages of "pregnancy" and that my baby was waking me up. Ironically, my baby was in the final stages of his mama's pregnancy.
I also remember thinking about him all the time. Granted, I didn't even know if he exsisted yet, or whether he was a he. But, thoughts of a baby, my baby, would crash from my mind to my heart. I would start crying randomly throughout my day.
I realized while sitting here, reading blogs adoption, that I'm doing it again. Who knows, maybe the cooler weather makes me long to snuggle with a tiny little person.
Sitting here, listening to the rain, I wonder about my baby. How old is he/she? Has he/she even been conceived yet? What will he/she look like? How much pain will line my road to get that baby?
I've been thinking about decorating the front bedroom, just to be ready. I bought a baby monitor... for Nathan? haha
There are so many uncertainties both financially and with my health, but my faith is unwavering where this little one is concerned. Oh sure, I had my moment of fear, but I know God will bring me another little one to love.
Shortly before Nathan came into my life, sleep doesn't always happen in one long shift. He's been sleeping through the night for over a year now, Praise the Lord!
I remember a little less than two years ago, waking up in the middle of the night for no reason. I would toss & turn and then finally get up. I hate just lying in bed awake. Friends would joke that I was in the final stages of "pregnancy" and that my baby was waking me up. Ironically, my baby was in the final stages of his mama's pregnancy.
I also remember thinking about him all the time. Granted, I didn't even know if he exsisted yet, or whether he was a he. But, thoughts of a baby, my baby, would crash from my mind to my heart. I would start crying randomly throughout my day.
I realized while sitting here, reading blogs adoption, that I'm doing it again. Who knows, maybe the cooler weather makes me long to snuggle with a tiny little person.
Sitting here, listening to the rain, I wonder about my baby. How old is he/she? Has he/she even been conceived yet? What will he/she look like? How much pain will line my road to get that baby?
I've been thinking about decorating the front bedroom, just to be ready. I bought a baby monitor... for Nathan? haha
There are so many uncertainties both financially and with my health, but my faith is unwavering where this little one is concerned. Oh sure, I had my moment of fear, but I know God will bring me another little one to love.
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Feeling a bit irked
It's seems like no matter what you do, adoption is cloaked in financial issues.
I've been told that perhaps we shouldn't adopt if can't afford it. I know I'm not the only one to be told this. It's a pretty common response, I guess.
When we brought Nathan home, and when we were in the process to adopt, people asked about the money quite a bit. I don't mind being asked, since I don't have anything to hide. But then something clicked in me this week.
I listen to Dave Ramsey a couple of times a week. Not all the time, and usually only if I'm in the car in the afternoon. I love his common sense aproach to money, and his advice has helped us get out of debt.
The reason I mention him, is I heard a call a couple of months ago about adoption. The lady was in a similar financial situation as us, and was looking at a loan to adopt. He told her that he never supports debt. Then this week he told a caller to put off getting out of debt to have a baby. His reason was there is never a "perfect" time to start a family. I agree with him, really. But this is what got me thinking.
When you get pregnant, you have insurance to cover most if not all of the costs. Pregnancy/Labor & Deliver cost a pretty penny. A friend of mine told me that her portion of it all was right up there with our adoption loan.
So why then do people feel the need to look down on adopting parents? Should I go around asking people if they can afford their hospital bills? Should I tell them not to get pregnant because they might need an emergency C-Section & haven't budgeted for that? No, I would never dream of telling people that.
I guess I am tired of feeling like a second class citizen in this parenting world.
I've been told that perhaps we shouldn't adopt if can't afford it. I know I'm not the only one to be told this. It's a pretty common response, I guess.
When we brought Nathan home, and when we were in the process to adopt, people asked about the money quite a bit. I don't mind being asked, since I don't have anything to hide. But then something clicked in me this week.
I listen to Dave Ramsey a couple of times a week. Not all the time, and usually only if I'm in the car in the afternoon. I love his common sense aproach to money, and his advice has helped us get out of debt.
The reason I mention him, is I heard a call a couple of months ago about adoption. The lady was in a similar financial situation as us, and was looking at a loan to adopt. He told her that he never supports debt. Then this week he told a caller to put off getting out of debt to have a baby. His reason was there is never a "perfect" time to start a family. I agree with him, really. But this is what got me thinking.
When you get pregnant, you have insurance to cover most if not all of the costs. Pregnancy/Labor & Deliver cost a pretty penny. A friend of mine told me that her portion of it all was right up there with our adoption loan.
So why then do people feel the need to look down on adopting parents? Should I go around asking people if they can afford their hospital bills? Should I tell them not to get pregnant because they might need an emergency C-Section & haven't budgeted for that? No, I would never dream of telling people that.
I guess I am tired of feeling like a second class citizen in this parenting world.
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Money, Health and Adoption
I'm going to preface this by saying that I don't want to post this. I believe that I am being led to post it. The only reason I don't want to do it, is because I take after my dad's side of the family and tend to be private about health stuff.
I have been pretty open about our financial plans with our current and next adoption. We are still working on paying off the first one, and plan to do the next with cash. We believe that God's word is clear about debt and don't want to ask Him to bless our debt.
For the last couple years, I have not had health insurance. Mike's job does not have good insurance so we opted to get private coverage. There are several reasons for us choosing to not cover me, that really aren't important for this post. Until recently, we've had no problems with my health. In fact, it has seemed that God even touched and healed my heart. Backstory for those who don't know: I was diagnosed with Mitral Valve Prolapse around the age of 19. My heart has always raced, with an avergage of 100bpm at resting. The norm is 70-80. I developed high blood pressure in my mid-20's. I had chest pains & palpatations frequently. Since moving to TN, my heart rate & BP are normal and I almost never have pains. PRAISE GOD!!
This week we found out that I may have cervical fibroids and possibly uterine fibroids. I will be having an ultrasound next month to determine all of this. The doctors are of course talking surgery. I will say, I'm not worried about my health. I know how routine all of this is, and that I will be just fine.
Where my faith has been shaken, and now become stronger, is the financial side of it all. We had just started the process to update our homestudy and looking at the next adoption in the Spring. My fear came in that we would not be able to adopt again, with not knowing what the medical bills would look like. This week I've been seeing pregnant women EVERYWHERE, and feeling it was being shoved in my face that I can't create a child.
Then God reminded me that this is not in my hands or for me to understand. He knows my body better than anyone. He knew we would deal with infertility and now that we'd be dealing with this. He knew what our financial situation would be and what it would take to bring us through it.
I am posting this, because I feel His prompting that this is going to be a testimony and He wants the glory!
I have tears in my eyes, knowing that my Heavenly Father loves me enough to give me good gifts. Knowing that children are a blessing and the He will give me the desires of my heart.
I have been pretty open about our financial plans with our current and next adoption. We are still working on paying off the first one, and plan to do the next with cash. We believe that God's word is clear about debt and don't want to ask Him to bless our debt.
For the last couple years, I have not had health insurance. Mike's job does not have good insurance so we opted to get private coverage. There are several reasons for us choosing to not cover me, that really aren't important for this post. Until recently, we've had no problems with my health. In fact, it has seemed that God even touched and healed my heart. Backstory for those who don't know: I was diagnosed with Mitral Valve Prolapse around the age of 19. My heart has always raced, with an avergage of 100bpm at resting. The norm is 70-80. I developed high blood pressure in my mid-20's. I had chest pains & palpatations frequently. Since moving to TN, my heart rate & BP are normal and I almost never have pains. PRAISE GOD!!
This week we found out that I may have cervical fibroids and possibly uterine fibroids. I will be having an ultrasound next month to determine all of this. The doctors are of course talking surgery. I will say, I'm not worried about my health. I know how routine all of this is, and that I will be just fine.
Where my faith has been shaken, and now become stronger, is the financial side of it all. We had just started the process to update our homestudy and looking at the next adoption in the Spring. My fear came in that we would not be able to adopt again, with not knowing what the medical bills would look like. This week I've been seeing pregnant women EVERYWHERE, and feeling it was being shoved in my face that I can't create a child.
Then God reminded me that this is not in my hands or for me to understand. He knows my body better than anyone. He knew we would deal with infertility and now that we'd be dealing with this. He knew what our financial situation would be and what it would take to bring us through it.
I am posting this, because I feel His prompting that this is going to be a testimony and He wants the glory!
I have tears in my eyes, knowing that my Heavenly Father loves me enough to give me good gifts. Knowing that children are a blessing and the He will give me the desires of my heart.
Friday, July 31, 2009
Unethical Adoptions
When we first decided that we wanted to adopt, ethics wasn't even a thought. We knew we wanted a baby, adoption agencies could make that happen, end of story, right?
Honestly, we didn't even interview the agency before we chose them. A family at church had used them and so we went with that. I think in the grand scheme of things, that office does a good job. There are other agencies that are not good. No matter what.
During our adoption process I joined an online message forum that is all about adoption. I've talked to lots of other adoptive parents, birth moms (first moms) and adoptees. Their stories and experiences have helped to educate me in the world of adoption. My eyes have been opened to what a horribly unethical industry adoption can be if left unchecked.
This week one of the ladies posted a link to this place: Adoptions First
Without even calling or clicking further in to there website, I see about 10 things wrong with this place. It is places like these that make me never want to adopt again! Offering a shopping spree & tour of LA in exchange for your baby?! Seriously?? Yep, they are very serious.
Another lady called them as a perspective birthmom, to find out more information about the place. I was floored at the treatment she got from them.
1. They wanted to fly her to LA when she would be 36 weeks pregnant.
2. She was told she only get 24 hours in the hospital, and that would be her only time with her baby prior to placement. Many agencies allow the mom to take the baby home to finalize her decision. This agency told her that would be to hard on the adoptive parents.
3. She would be taken straight from the hospital to her paid for apartment to sign her parental rights away. No time to fully consider the weight of what she is doing.
4. She mentioned that having all of her expenses paid would put alot of pressure on her to place. The woman from the agency said "oh there is EXTRAORDINARY pressure to place! Absolutely!"
It sickens me to think of how many times they do this to women. If someone is making the decision to place her baby, she should have the support and freedom to explore all of her options.
But see here's the thing. Places like this will stay in business as long as people keep using them.
If you're looking to adopt, ask the agency questions. Lots of questions about how the mothers of these babies are treated. Are they given all the information possible about their ability to parent? Are they made to feel pressure because of expenses being paid? Are they allowed as much time as needed with THEIR baby before signing TPR? Ask what percentage of women who come to them actually place. The higher the number, the more sirens you should be hearing.
Adoption is a permanent solution to a temporary problem in most cases. Even if they have gone to the agency, chosen an adoptive family and given birth, this baby is still hers. She can still decide that she can parent after all. She should never be coerced into giving her baby up if that's not what she wants to do.
Honestly, we didn't even interview the agency before we chose them. A family at church had used them and so we went with that. I think in the grand scheme of things, that office does a good job. There are other agencies that are not good. No matter what.
During our adoption process I joined an online message forum that is all about adoption. I've talked to lots of other adoptive parents, birth moms (first moms) and adoptees. Their stories and experiences have helped to educate me in the world of adoption. My eyes have been opened to what a horribly unethical industry adoption can be if left unchecked.
This week one of the ladies posted a link to this place: Adoptions First
Without even calling or clicking further in to there website, I see about 10 things wrong with this place. It is places like these that make me never want to adopt again! Offering a shopping spree & tour of LA in exchange for your baby?! Seriously?? Yep, they are very serious.
Another lady called them as a perspective birthmom, to find out more information about the place. I was floored at the treatment she got from them.
1. They wanted to fly her to LA when she would be 36 weeks pregnant.
2. She was told she only get 24 hours in the hospital, and that would be her only time with her baby prior to placement. Many agencies allow the mom to take the baby home to finalize her decision. This agency told her that would be to hard on the adoptive parents.
3. She would be taken straight from the hospital to her paid for apartment to sign her parental rights away. No time to fully consider the weight of what she is doing.
4. She mentioned that having all of her expenses paid would put alot of pressure on her to place. The woman from the agency said "oh there is EXTRAORDINARY pressure to place! Absolutely!"
It sickens me to think of how many times they do this to women. If someone is making the decision to place her baby, she should have the support and freedom to explore all of her options.
But see here's the thing. Places like this will stay in business as long as people keep using them.
If you're looking to adopt, ask the agency questions. Lots of questions about how the mothers of these babies are treated. Are they given all the information possible about their ability to parent? Are they made to feel pressure because of expenses being paid? Are they allowed as much time as needed with THEIR baby before signing TPR? Ask what percentage of women who come to them actually place. The higher the number, the more sirens you should be hearing.
Adoption is a permanent solution to a temporary problem in most cases. Even if they have gone to the agency, chosen an adoptive family and given birth, this baby is still hers. She can still decide that she can parent after all. She should never be coerced into giving her baby up if that's not what she wants to do.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Transracial Adoption as Cultural Genocide
I really let this article get to me yesterday.
http://www.newsweek.com/id/194886/page/1 ~ Yes there is a lot more to this article than the cultural genocide remark, but it just hit a nerve for me.
Here's some thoughts and someone please tell me if I WAY off base in these. I am very open to honest exchange on this.
As for Cultural Genocide: I think that statement is pretty extreme, but let's take it for face value.
1. I have every intention to teach Nathan about our country's history. We will explore slavery, segregation and the wonderful leaders who rose up in our nation in opposition to the hatred. However, I would teach this to my children regardless of the color of their skin. It is OUR history, no matter the side our ancestors were on in the time. We have already taken Nathan to the place where Dr. King was murdered. We toured the museum and while he is still too young, we will be visiting places like this regularly. I love that we live in the South & can visit Civil War Sites and see where history was made.
2. We will explore how many cultures in our country express themselves. I want to educate my children in as much as possible. I think a big problem is our country is not being willing to understand another's point of view & beliefs. You do not have to embrace them for yourself, but education is key.
3. My kids will experience much more than American cuisine. There is life beyond hamburgers, casseroles and grilled chicken. My husband is mostly Italian & I am mostly Irish. I plan to teach my kids about these cultures. Far more than my parents even did. Mike's education on his Italian heritage is his Grandma's Pasta Sauce & mine was Corn Beef & Cabbage. (which I hate by the way) lol
As far as cultural genocide, I had another thought. I am from Southern California and didn't move from there until my late 20's. There is a definite cultural difference between there and Middle Tennessee where I now live. I know this goes for every part of our country. Even if they decide that adopting across "race" lines is wrong, what about state lines?? Seriously. There is so much about life in the south that I still don't get or even know about.
Something I am having a hard time with as well. African Culture. Someone please tell me which part of African Culture I am supposed to be teaching my son. Africa is a huge continent, represented by numerous cultures.
I firmly believe that the most important thing parents can do for their children is this: raise them in a safe and loving home, teach them to love God and other people. Everything else is gravy on the meal. When we get to Heaven, God won't be quizzing us about our cultural education. He will ask us what we did with our knowledge of His Son's life.
As a white adoptive parent, there are so many pressures placed on me. Whether spoken or not. I am very fortunate in that most of our experiences have been very positive. I can't tell you how many sweet older black women have stopped me in the store offering help. Some could take this as offensive, but I could tell that they genuinely wants to help me. As a white person, hair care of a black child can be daunting at best.
So many people have asked me really great and honest questions about our adoption. I love being able to educate people in a very open & informal way. I have been able to talk to people about adoption, relationships with birthparents, being a multi-racial family and most importantly God. I would not have as many opportunities if my son looked like me.
http://www.newsweek.com/id
Here's some thoughts and someone please tell me if I WAY off base in these. I am very open to honest exchange on this.
As for Cultural Genocide: I think that statement is pretty extreme, but let's take it for face value.
1. I have every intention to teach Nathan about our country's history. We will explore slavery, segregation and the wonderful leaders who rose up in our nation in opposition to the hatred. However, I would teach this to my children regardless of the color of their skin. It is OUR history, no matter the side our ancestors were on in the time. We have already taken Nathan to the place where Dr. King was murdered. We toured the museum and while he is still too young, we will be visiting places like this regularly. I love that we live in the South & can visit Civil War Sites and see where history was made.
2. We will explore how many cultures in our country express themselves. I want to educate my children in as much as possible. I think a big problem is our country is not being willing to understand another's point of view & beliefs. You do not have to embrace them for yourself, but education is key.
3. My kids will experience much more than American cuisine. There is life beyond hamburgers, casseroles and grilled chicken. My husband is mostly Italian & I am mostly Irish. I plan to teach my kids about these cultures. Far more than my parents even did. Mike's education on his Italian heritage is his Grandma's Pasta Sauce & mine was Corn Beef & Cabbage. (which I hate by the way) lol
As far as cultural genocide, I had another thought. I am from Southern California and didn't move from there until my late 20's. There is a definite cultural difference between there and Middle Tennessee where I now live. I know this goes for every part of our country. Even if they decide that adopting across "race" lines is wrong, what about state lines?? Seriously. There is so much about life in the south that I still don't get or even know about.
Something I am having a hard time with as well. African Culture. Someone please tell me which part of African Culture I am supposed to be teaching my son. Africa is a huge continent, represented by numerous cultures.
I firmly believe that the most important thing parents can do for their children is this: raise them in a safe and loving home, teach them to love God and other people. Everything else is gravy on the meal. When we get to Heaven, God won't be quizzing us about our cultural education. He will ask us what we did with our knowledge of His Son's life.
As a white adoptive parent, there are so many pressures placed on me. Whether spoken or not. I am very fortunate in that most of our experiences have been very positive. I can't tell you how many sweet older black women have stopped me in the store offering help. Some could take this as offensive, but I could tell that they genuinely wants to help me. As a white person, hair care of a black child can be daunting at best.
So many people have asked me really great and honest questions about our adoption. I love being able to educate people in a very open & informal way. I have been able to talk to people about adoption, relationships with birthparents, being a multi-racial family and most importantly God. I would not have as many opportunities if my son looked like me.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Adoption, babies and emotions
We are patiently (okay, maybe that's a stretch) waiting for our tax return. This is the first year that we get to take some of the adoption tax credit. AWESOME by the way.
Over the weekend we sat down and seriously talked about how we want to move forward with the next adoption. At this point, unless God tells us otherwise, we will be doing another Domestic Infant Adoption. We had tossed around some other ideas, but this route just seems right. We are now praying about the money side of it, but know that God will take care of it.
As I sit in a quiet moment, I am so excited that I want to scream! haha Seriously though. We've seen God do awesome things in adoptions and I can't wait to see what He has planned for us. I am excited and nervous about how our next baby will come to our family.
Alot of the unknowns are out of the way with this adoption. We've sort of "been there done that" with the paperwork and interviews. This time we will only have to update our homestudy, so it won't be nearly as rough.
I wonder about our baby, much like I wondered about Nathan. Has he/she been conceived yet? What is going on in the lives of her birthparents? Is he/she in this state or across the country? Will he/she be healthy or have some complications? I have started praying for this child, even I know nothing about him/her. My heart already aches for the woman who will be carrying this baby and the decisions laid out before her. Yes, I am praying for her as well. I wonder how Nathan will react to the baby. He loves the babies at church so much and I think he will be an awesome big brother. (k, the tears are starting now.) I am not looking forward to sleepless nights, but know the best bonding happens at 2am! I think about the extended family, who may never get the chance to love this little one. I hope they will be supportive in the midst of their own pain.
I'm telling you, if you want a racing mix of emotions, consider adoption.
Over the weekend we sat down and seriously talked about how we want to move forward with the next adoption. At this point, unless God tells us otherwise, we will be doing another Domestic Infant Adoption. We had tossed around some other ideas, but this route just seems right. We are now praying about the money side of it, but know that God will take care of it.
As I sit in a quiet moment, I am so excited that I want to scream! haha Seriously though. We've seen God do awesome things in adoptions and I can't wait to see what He has planned for us. I am excited and nervous about how our next baby will come to our family.
Alot of the unknowns are out of the way with this adoption. We've sort of "been there done that" with the paperwork and interviews. This time we will only have to update our homestudy, so it won't be nearly as rough.
I wonder about our baby, much like I wondered about Nathan. Has he/she been conceived yet? What is going on in the lives of her birthparents? Is he/she in this state or across the country? Will he/she be healthy or have some complications? I have started praying for this child, even I know nothing about him/her. My heart already aches for the woman who will be carrying this baby and the decisions laid out before her. Yes, I am praying for her as well. I wonder how Nathan will react to the baby. He loves the babies at church so much and I think he will be an awesome big brother. (k, the tears are starting now.) I am not looking forward to sleepless nights, but know the best bonding happens at 2am! I think about the extended family, who may never get the chance to love this little one. I hope they will be supportive in the midst of their own pain.
I'm telling you, if you want a racing mix of emotions, consider adoption.
Monday, January 12, 2009
Don't miss out
My friend Brea is having an awesome raffle that ends on Thursday. Tickets are only $10!! Seriously folks, that's a deal. Buy 2 or 3 or 10. It's worth it.
"It is on a 16x20 canvas with a 20 1/2x24 1/2 frame. It is a mixed media using paper, ink, thread, acrylic paint, charcoal and a medium matte glaze. Laura will add the child's name to the piece for whoever wins. She will paint it or ink it in the left hand corner following the curve of the flower petals...you can see the blank space I left for it."They are doing this raffle to raise funds for their next adoption. So, go enter to win!!
Monday, January 5, 2009
Go Bid on this
I will be winning it, but go bid anyhow.... just kidding, well, I want to win it. haha
This is just beautiful and the money is going to a good cause. My friend Brea & her hubby Jonathan, who adopted their 4th child last year are in the process of adopting their 5th child. They, like us are raising money for costs of adoption.http://breagirl.blogspot.com/2009/01/our-beautiful-raffle-piece.html
Sunday, December 21, 2008
One Year Ago Today
It was one year ago today that Nathan came home.
As I watch him toddling around the house, jabbering all the way, I am amazed.
We've watched him grow and learn and change so much. I just cannot imagine our lives without this little guy.
Today we went out to lunch with some friends after church. Nathan was exhausted and after he finished his food, I picked him up, and he was out. He then slept on me for close to an hour. I love this being a mommy deal.
First time I held him ( I was a bit heavier back then)
On our way home from the Adoption Agency
Daddy feeding him for the first time
Our Christmas Present ~ I had been praying every year for a baby for Christmas. Last year that prayer was answered. God is SO Good!!
In his big boy chair
Big boy hair cut & facing foward in his carseat
As I watch him toddling around the house, jabbering all the way, I am amazed.
We've watched him grow and learn and change so much. I just cannot imagine our lives without this little guy.
Today we went out to lunch with some friends after church. Nathan was exhausted and after he finished his food, I picked him up, and he was out. He then slept on me for close to an hour. I love this being a mommy deal.
First time I held him ( I was a bit heavier back then)
On our way home from the Adoption Agency
Daddy feeding him for the first time
Our Christmas Present ~ I had been praying every year for a baby for Christmas. Last year that prayer was answered. God is SO Good!!
In his big boy chair
Big boy hair cut & facing foward in his carseat
Monday, December 15, 2008
Adoption Fundraiser
I haven't talked about this a whole lately, so an update is good.
I am going to take a couple of months to do some serious sewing, and get a good amount of inventory stacked up. Then I will do a big push on my etsy site all at once.
We are also going to be doing a big yard sale in April. Friends of ours live in a subdivision that does a huge yard sale every six months. People know about it, and plan on going all the time. This is perfect for our yard sale.
So, if you live in the Middle Tennessee area and have something that you would like to donate, please let me know. You can email me at mamasmess@gmail.com
We have had two cash donations to the fund of $150. We are so grateful and humbled when someone gives to us. You put it out there, but knowing that times are tough, don't truly expect anything. So, to those who gave, thank you!!
Also, if you have any ideas of great fundraisers, I'm open to all ideas!
Thank you to everyone who has been supporting us in this journey. Your prayers, love and support mean more than anything right now!
I am going to take a couple of months to do some serious sewing, and get a good amount of inventory stacked up. Then I will do a big push on my etsy site all at once.
We are also going to be doing a big yard sale in April. Friends of ours live in a subdivision that does a huge yard sale every six months. People know about it, and plan on going all the time. This is perfect for our yard sale.
So, if you live in the Middle Tennessee area and have something that you would like to donate, please let me know. You can email me at mamasmess@gmail.com
We have had two cash donations to the fund of $150. We are so grateful and humbled when someone gives to us. You put it out there, but knowing that times are tough, don't truly expect anything. So, to those who gave, thank you!!
Also, if you have any ideas of great fundraisers, I'm open to all ideas!
Thank you to everyone who has been supporting us in this journey. Your prayers, love and support mean more than anything right now!
Monday, December 8, 2008
One Year Ago
One year ago today, our lives were changed.
Well, it was on the 10th, but it was a Monday.
We had been in the adoption process for a year, and had been approved & waiting for 3 months. In the world of adoption, waiting 3 months in nothing. But, we had been trying to have a baby for 9 years, so we were very ready for the wait to be over.
Throughout the summer, I'd been learning faith & patience. God had been dealing with me in a whole new way. I was leading a Ladies Bible Study on Wednesdays and He used those ladies to speak to me, encourage and support me.
By Monday, December 10th, I was ready to let go of any control I wanted in having our child. I told God that morning, if He wanted to wait another year to make me a mommy, I would trust His plan. Around lunchtime, my pastor called to touch base with me & see how I was holding up. I told him the same that I had just told God.
Then around 1:30 I was at the computer, though for the life of me, I can't remember what I was doing. Anyhow, the phone rang... I saw it was our adoption agency... now, I need to back up for those who don't know this story.
Just after Thanksgiving last year, our agency seemed to have a lot of babies born or being born. They were all either black or bi-racial. Not many adoptive couples are willing to adopt other than white babies. Our profile was being shown to 3 mothers, who were placing their babies for adoption. So, I was fielding a lot of calls from our Case Worker. Every time that phone rang, I held my breath. I was always afraid of what it might be... another mom who chose another family, or went MIA. Yet, I was also hopeful that it would be THE call.
So, that Monday afternoon the phone rang. I can still hear Carolyn's words. "Kelly, this is Carolyn. This is THE call sweety. You have been chosen." Tears are filling my eyes as I write this. She told me all the details, yet I could barely hear her. haha I had to call her back to get it all again. I called my husband and told him he was daddy & had a son. Then, I spent the rest of the day (and 3 phone batteries!) calling our family and friends.
Our years of waiting were coming to an end! We did have to wait almost 2 weeks to bring Nathan home, and in some ways , it felt longer than the 9 year wait!!
Not a day goes by that I'm not reminded of how God prepared me for that day. I had to be broken down and humbled. I had to completely surrender to His plans. My son will always be a reminder to me that God knows best. Someone recently commented on how well Nathan fits us. I smiled, because I know God knew which baby we were to have.
That baby, is now a toddler. He has so much personality and is a little lovebug. He loves hugs & kisses & cuddling with his mama. He also loves to rough-house, tackling his daddy whenever he can. He is obsessed with his dogs, and looks for them after every nap. He has a little southern accents that melts my heart. His eyes sparkle and his smile lights up his whole face. He has a temper that rivals any, and can scream like no other.
I pray daily that I am up to the task of molding him into the man that God wants to him to be. I pray that he will be loving, and strong, respectful and kind, generous and smart, and most of all God fearing. I plan to teach him how to sew, cook, and clean, while his daddy can't wait to teach him about tools, cars and guy stuff. lol Mike and I have always said that we want our kids to be well rounded, and know how to do things for themselves.
If you made it through this long post, thank you. I enjoyed remembering that special day.
Well, it was on the 10th, but it was a Monday.
We had been in the adoption process for a year, and had been approved & waiting for 3 months. In the world of adoption, waiting 3 months in nothing. But, we had been trying to have a baby for 9 years, so we were very ready for the wait to be over.
Throughout the summer, I'd been learning faith & patience. God had been dealing with me in a whole new way. I was leading a Ladies Bible Study on Wednesdays and He used those ladies to speak to me, encourage and support me.
By Monday, December 10th, I was ready to let go of any control I wanted in having our child. I told God that morning, if He wanted to wait another year to make me a mommy, I would trust His plan. Around lunchtime, my pastor called to touch base with me & see how I was holding up. I told him the same that I had just told God.
Then around 1:30 I was at the computer, though for the life of me, I can't remember what I was doing. Anyhow, the phone rang... I saw it was our adoption agency... now, I need to back up for those who don't know this story.
Just after Thanksgiving last year, our agency seemed to have a lot of babies born or being born. They were all either black or bi-racial. Not many adoptive couples are willing to adopt other than white babies. Our profile was being shown to 3 mothers, who were placing their babies for adoption. So, I was fielding a lot of calls from our Case Worker. Every time that phone rang, I held my breath. I was always afraid of what it might be... another mom who chose another family, or went MIA. Yet, I was also hopeful that it would be THE call.
So, that Monday afternoon the phone rang. I can still hear Carolyn's words. "Kelly, this is Carolyn. This is THE call sweety. You have been chosen." Tears are filling my eyes as I write this. She told me all the details, yet I could barely hear her. haha I had to call her back to get it all again. I called my husband and told him he was daddy & had a son. Then, I spent the rest of the day (and 3 phone batteries!) calling our family and friends.
Our years of waiting were coming to an end! We did have to wait almost 2 weeks to bring Nathan home, and in some ways , it felt longer than the 9 year wait!!
Not a day goes by that I'm not reminded of how God prepared me for that day. I had to be broken down and humbled. I had to completely surrender to His plans. My son will always be a reminder to me that God knows best. Someone recently commented on how well Nathan fits us. I smiled, because I know God knew which baby we were to have.
That baby, is now a toddler. He has so much personality and is a little lovebug. He loves hugs & kisses & cuddling with his mama. He also loves to rough-house, tackling his daddy whenever he can. He is obsessed with his dogs, and looks for them after every nap. He has a little southern accents that melts my heart. His eyes sparkle and his smile lights up his whole face. He has a temper that rivals any, and can scream like no other.
I pray daily that I am up to the task of molding him into the man that God wants to him to be. I pray that he will be loving, and strong, respectful and kind, generous and smart, and most of all God fearing. I plan to teach him how to sew, cook, and clean, while his daddy can't wait to teach him about tools, cars and guy stuff. lol Mike and I have always said that we want our kids to be well rounded, and know how to do things for themselves.
If you made it through this long post, thank you. I enjoyed remembering that special day.
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Ch Ch Ch Changes!
Wow! So much has changed around here lately.
3 years ago we lived in California, had a horse, a bunch of goats, 2 dogs, 2 cats, and travel trailer. Oh, and no babies.
2 years ago, we moved to Tennessee, had no house, 2 dogs, one cat & a travel trailer. Oh, and no babies.
1 year ago, we had a house, 2 dogs, 1 cat & travel trailer. Oh and our baby had been born, we just didn't know it yet.
Now, we just celebrated our babies 1st birthday, found a home for our cat & sold our travel trailer. Over the summer we also traded our truck for a durango.
Our priorities have shifted so much. Even though we loved our trailer, we had a loan for it. With trying to pay off the first adoption and considering our options for the second, it just didn't seem right to be putting money into debt.
In honor of the cat & the trailer, enjoy some pictures.
Oh, btw the black cat is bailey. She passed away just before we moved, two years ago. Jasmine is the one we just found a home for.
This is where we lived for 6 weeks, when we moved to TN. It's in our friend's backyard.
On our way from CA to TN.
Camping in Utah, May of 2006. It was this trip that we decided to move out of state.
Back in 2003, when we first got the trailer.
Jasmine, she loved laying this way.
Cat nap.
Back we Jasmine was a kitten.
3 years ago we lived in California, had a horse, a bunch of goats, 2 dogs, 2 cats, and travel trailer. Oh, and no babies.
2 years ago, we moved to Tennessee, had no house, 2 dogs, one cat & a travel trailer. Oh, and no babies.
1 year ago, we had a house, 2 dogs, 1 cat & travel trailer. Oh and our baby had been born, we just didn't know it yet.
Now, we just celebrated our babies 1st birthday, found a home for our cat & sold our travel trailer. Over the summer we also traded our truck for a durango.
Our priorities have shifted so much. Even though we loved our trailer, we had a loan for it. With trying to pay off the first adoption and considering our options for the second, it just didn't seem right to be putting money into debt.
In honor of the cat & the trailer, enjoy some pictures.
Oh, btw the black cat is bailey. She passed away just before we moved, two years ago. Jasmine is the one we just found a home for.
This is where we lived for 6 weeks, when we moved to TN. It's in our friend's backyard.
On our way from CA to TN.
Camping in Utah, May of 2006. It was this trip that we decided to move out of state.
Back in 2003, when we first got the trailer.
Jasmine, she loved laying this way.
Cat nap.
Back we Jasmine was a kitten.
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Apron
Look for this on Etsy later today. It will be selling for $20.00
I really like this apron. It came out of my own creativity (scary, huh??) Anyhow, it has a d-ring at the neck, so it's adjustable. Ties in the back at the waist. the polka dots & flowers are the same colors, but I love the contrast.
Because I believe in truth in advertising... lol The ruffle in the front, can be tricky. I tried starching it, but it wants to flop down. I didn't have any problems with it once its on, but just so you know. I guess I made it a little too tall.
If you want to buy it before it gets to etsy, simply use the "Pay Me" Link to the right & let me know that you are buying it.
Edited ~ Finally a half-way decent picture. I took at least a dozen, maybe more!
I really like this apron. It came out of my own creativity (scary, huh??) Anyhow, it has a d-ring at the neck, so it's adjustable. Ties in the back at the waist. the polka dots & flowers are the same colors, but I love the contrast.
Because I believe in truth in advertising... lol The ruffle in the front, can be tricky. I tried starching it, but it wants to flop down. I didn't have any problems with it once its on, but just so you know. I guess I made it a little too tall.
If you want to buy it before it gets to etsy, simply use the "Pay Me" Link to the right & let me know that you are buying it.
Edited ~ Finally a half-way decent picture. I took at least a dozen, maybe more!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)