Gone before you know it

I never did blog about or talk much about the passing of Maria Chapman. I wanted to post something asking for prayers for the family, and such. But, I just couldn't bring myself to put words down. It seemed like everywhere I turned, I was hearing something about it or reading about it. I cried for the family, and prayed for comfort. I wondered about the woman who gave birth to her. Is she still alive? Does she know what happened?

I have always wondered how a parent handles the tragic loss of a child. I have wondered how I myself would handle it. Oh, how I hope and pray that I will find strength and comfort in God.

I am very moved by music, much more than anything else. Lately there have been a couple songs that just bring me to tears. The main one lately is Cinderella by Steven Curtis Chapman.

This verse brings a tear to my eyes every time...

So I will dance with Cinderella
While she is here in my arms
Cause I know something the prince never knew
Oh, I will dance with Cinderella
I don't want to miss even one song
Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight
And she'll be gone...

I know when he wrote this song, midnight signified her growing up. Not being in his home anymore, off living her life as an adult. But, I can't help thinking about how none of us promised tomorrow. We make plans for our lives and just expect that we will all still be here in 10, 20 or 50 years.

All too often we see the situation we are in, and just want to pass onto the next. Being a mom makes me realize this all so much more. I see Nathan and I know that he will grow into a smart, strong young man. I get frustrated at the sleepless nights and long for the next phase. Then, I look back and miss the days already behind us.

I don't want to regret a missing a single moment. I pray that Nathan and any other children we are blessed with grow up healthy and happy. But, if for some reason God has other plans, I don't to regret missing little moments.

Just last night, we were all on the couch having some family time. Nathan said "ma". He has been making mmmm sounds, and this was his first syllable. TAKE THAT DOCTOR! haha.

Anyhow, I was so thankful that I let the dishes sit for a while longer and just took time with him. I would have missed it otherwise!! It also made me remember that he is growing up. I can never get that first back. It has happened.

I will stop rambling now, and hope that this made some sense to anyone still reading. Go embrace life and enjoy the little moments while they happen.